Silly Sundays - Help I've Fallen And I Can't Get Up

Happy Sunday evening everyone -

I don't now if the following tidbit could be considered "silly" or just fuktarded. You be the judge. Also, if you want to play along...stop over to The Blue Zoo and link up. Even if you don't want to play along, stop over anyway, you won't regret it!

We got DUMPED on here on the east coast on Friday. Thursday evening I went to bed we had NO snow. Friday I couldn't leave the house because the guy that blows out my driveway couldn't get down my road until late afternoon. I drive a car with 18" tires and there was no way in hell I was getting through that mess.

Saturday I fell. I never fall. I wear three inch heels through most of the winter and skip across icy sidewalks the way Julie Andrews skipped through the fields in the Sound of Music (minus the gaggle of kids following me). I do not fall. Saturday Nora and I were heading out to the mall, I had sneakers on (don't judge) for hell's sake. My foot hit the top step of the deck and I felt it slipping. It went something like this.

Oh (thhh thunk)
Shit (thhhh thunk)
Owww (thhh thunk)
Damn (thhh thunk)
It (thh thunk)

And then I landed in the snowbank. Unable to breath, convinced my back had snapped in a million pieces and I would just freeze to death in the snowbank.  My tailbone hit every damn step on the way down. Nora is standing on the deck almost in hysterics because she thought I was dead. I couldn't speak because all ability to breathe had been knocked the fuck out of me. I have a flat ass. Seriously, you could set a level on my ass and it would be totally straight. I have no padding there. You know those bones you have in each ass cheek. Yeah, they really hurt when  you bring 170 pounds down on top of them. Nora is kneeling behind me, "Mom are you ok, MOM???" trying to drag me up by my armpits. All I can do is nod. When I finally managed to pick myself up out of the snowbank Nora said to me, "Mom I'm so glad you're not 50". I asked her, "What does being 50 have to do with it hun?" She replies, "Well, if you were 50 a fall like that would totally kill you." I have 14 years left people, 14 years before a fall like that will take me out!!

Then I went to the gym today. I know, I'm beyond retarded. I never ever denied it. But please, feel free to tell me JUST how retarded I am.  I really thought I was ok. Really. Now...well I can't sit down (I'm standing at the kitchen counter right now). Standing kinda hurts too, now that I think about it. Laying down .....yeah that's not really an option either. It's probably just a really bad bruise, right?