Week Two Weigh In

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Well, it’s Monday. Happy Monday! It’s also weigh in day. I was rather excited about this weeks’ weigh in because I have been a very good girl over the past week. I’ve even started journaling using My Fitness Pal. This is not something I’ve done in the past. The last time I lost a significant amount of weight I did it through exercise and eating in moderation. I did not track the number of calories I stuffed into my face in the run of a day. Now I am and according to the fitness pal I have consumed on average 100 calories less per day than I’m allowed. Also, I went to the gym FIVE freakin times this week, each time doing an HOUR of cardio. So excited to step on the scales, right?


Well, y’all can imagine my surprise when the scales indicated I had lost one pound. ONE FUCKING POUND. Don’t bother telling me “it’s a pound Dual Mom…it’s a loss, don’t be upset”. If you tell me that shit I’m liable to go ballistic on your ass. PEOPLE, five fucking hours of cardiac exercise I did last week. I’m not talking casual strolling on the treadmill here. I’m talking working out until the heart rate monitor on the machine is telling you to slow the fuck down because you’re about to stroke out and there’s no one handy that’s willing to do CPR on you. Do you know what I could have done besides working myself into a complete fucking lather in those five hours? I could have worked on my couch ass groove for christ sake. FUUUUUCCCCK.


So after standing there contemplating jumping all 170.5 pounds of me up and down on the scales until it was splattered into smithereens the way the fucking thing deserved, and after having my daughter come tearing into my bedroom to find out why her mother was cursing at the top of her lungs like a whore at a truck stop so early in the morning…… I decided to get dressed. Today I was wearing THE black pants. All women have a pair of THE black pants. You know the ones. The ones that look great on you even though you’re pmsing and have put five pounds on. You know the ones that you can wear with a weight fluctuation of up to 10 pounds. In actuality, it was these black pants that got me on this health kick. I had them on one day last month and by the end of the day I felt as though someone was slicing me in two. I almost had to go to the ER to have the damn things surgically removed from my waist at the end of the day, they were cutting into me THAT badly. The one pair of pants that I could wear with any type of weight fluctuation no longer fit me.

This morning I put them on and they fit. Yeah, they are still snug, but I don’t feel as though someone’s taking a hacksaw to my midsection. So something’s happening ……… the scales just aren’t showing it. I’m actually ok with that.

And I cried on the elliptical trainer Saturday, at the gym, in front of a bunch of skinny bitches. See, I thought it would take months to get back into being able to exercise the way I used to. I thought between the weight gain and the fact that I haven’t exercised in almost 3 years, my body would completely revolt against abruptly going from working on my ass groove to actually working out. But it hasn’t. Saturday I did a half hour on the treadmill, alternating between running (not fast) and walking with a 6% incline (which just kills me btw). Then I hopped on the elliptical (which is easier on the knees). I set it for 30 minutes, alternating between 0% and 25% resistance. Up until Saturday, I’ve had to cry uncle and bring the resistance down to 15% halfway through the 30 minutes. I just couldn’t finish the 30 minutes at the 25%. My heart rate would go into “you’re going to stroke” zone and my legs felt like they were just going to spontaneously disconnect from my body if I took one more step. On Saturday, I got through the entire workout without having to lower the resistance and my heart rate stayed within the cardio zone. I was so incredibly happy when the machine started doing the 5 second countdown thing all I could do was hang my head as the tears rolled down my face. I did it, I pushed my body and it responded, and anyone that has ever pushed themselves physically knows what an incredible feeling it is to have your body respond with “yeah…we can do this” rather than “fuck you floppy gut, your ass is too big to work this hard”. I’m sure skinny bitches were wondering why the crazy lady was smiling so serenely as she wiped down the machine. Let ‘em wonder.

So bring it on folks, I can’t wait to read how your week went.

22 comments:

Homesick Cajun said...
January 18, 2010 at 10:04 AM

Oh good Lord....I think I WOULD have jumped on the scale and broke it! Lol... I'm sorry your weight loss wasn't what it was! I need to get my ass on a treadmill somewhere *shakes head* my husband's daughter is getting married next month and I'm probably 15lbs heavier than I want to be! But I can't seem to get motivated for the life of me!

Laura said...
January 18, 2010 at 10:18 AM

Not that I'm happy about you're only 1 pound loss, but I'm really not thinking I'm going to do much better this week.

Yet like you my clothes feel different. I'm so proud and envious that you kicked some major ass on the treadmill & elliptical. It makes me feel better, knowing that it won't take me forever to get to the level I want to be at.

Logical Libby said...
January 18, 2010 at 10:37 AM

I am hoping to finally hit the 10 pound mark this week. I don't know if that will happen because I totally derailed myself over the weekend, but I am hoping.

And I liked the award. I'm just sarcastic!

MindyMom said...
January 18, 2010 at 10:51 AM

I feel your pain. I've been busting my ass working out 5-6 times a week for the last 8 weeks and haven't dropped ONE POUND! I have 4 kids and have dropped 40 lbs after each one so it's not like I dont know HOW to lose weight - I'm doing everything I should be but it AIN'T WORKING this time!!

Ugh.

June said...
January 18, 2010 at 11:12 AM

I have multiple pairs of black pants and totally relate!

Good job on making it through the workout on Saturday. I know how hard it is - I am pushing a few more minutes every day on my elliptical. You are doing better than me!!

GunDiva said...
January 18, 2010 at 12:39 PM

MindyMom, I feel your pain! I've been such a good girl and the scale's not moving. Not one ounce. I just have to hold onto the whole "I feel better" thing and try not to get frustrated.

DM, I loved when I realized that even being 35# heavier than the last time I started a workout regime that I wasn't nearly as out of shape as I had thought. The first time I started working out, I could't complete nine minutes on resistance 1 on the elliptical machine. I *started out* this time completing twenty-eight minutes on variable resistance!

Haven't noticed a change in the way my clothes fit, though, and I'm impatiently waiting, 'cause I'm down to one pair of slacks that fit and two pair of scrub pants. Please, please, please let this be the week that I start seeing a change.

suzicate said...
January 18, 2010 at 1:07 PM

If it's any consolation, you did better than me...I have yet to lose a single pound!!!! Yeah, I'd like to stomp my freakin scales to tiny little fragments, too!!!

blueviolet said...
January 18, 2010 at 2:01 PM

It's muscle! You're starting to build a little muscle and that weighs more but it will be offset by the amount of extra calories you'll be burning. This is good!!!

The Blue Zoo said...
January 18, 2010 at 3:58 PM

LMAO Sounds like your scale got what it deserved!

Aunt Juicebox said...
January 18, 2010 at 4:54 PM

Well I guess you can just hope you're building muscle with all the workouts. I pay less attention to my weight and more to my clothing too. Although I actually was able to look in the mirror and notice a slight difference. I lost nothing this week, and then this weekend was a total loss because of all the traveling we did. That's the downside of low carb eating, NOBODY caters to it. Sometimes I'm willing to peel the bun off my cheeseburger, but mostly I'm not. lol But back on the straight and narrow this week, and hoping to get in some exercise IF my ass can get some sleep at night, so that I'm not falling over the rest of the day.

Monique-aka-Surferwife23 said...
January 18, 2010 at 5:21 PM

The scale can really be an enemy! But how our clothes fit never lie. Good job, girl!

Kellyansapansa said...
January 18, 2010 at 5:23 PM

As well as weighing in every week, you should calculate your body fat. Then you'll really be able to measure your results, as building muscle can hide fat loss when you're just using the scales. Don't be discouraged - any loss is a win!

Queen of Feisty said...
January 18, 2010 at 6:22 PM

Alright well I know you hate me because of my whole 3 lbs lost. BUT that is for the last 18 days. I may not make you feel better knowing that I ate pizza and taco bell, BUT know that I haven't worked out, so my fat is just slowly fading, while yours is turning into sexy rexy muscle. Better?

Feisty.

Terry said...
January 18, 2010 at 6:51 PM

I threw my scale out the window...yep. And you are doing awesome with the exercise!! Keep going and share some of your motivation with me!!

Shandal said...
January 18, 2010 at 9:10 PM

Don't let that discourage you. I bet you are gaining muscle, and losing fat. So overall I think you're doing a fantastic job! Keep up all your hard work!

gayle said...
January 18, 2010 at 11:46 PM

Sounds like you were perfect last week..and I bet it shows up more next week!! I do know what you mean about the scales...I was telling my husband that every time I get on the scales and then off and then back on again it tells something different and he said well just get on it once... but it is driving me crazy...he said the scales are normal.. but for once ...I Don't believe him...I am going out tomorrow and buy another scale. Keep up the good work...I am going to try to be more like you!!

adrienzgirl said...
January 19, 2010 at 12:13 AM

Weren't you the one telling everyone else the a pound is a pound? Just sayin'....

I can take my jeans off without unbuttoning them. Don't freak out when you see my weight loss. Remember I got a WHOLE LOT more to lose than you! :D

Nathanael Rey said...
January 19, 2010 at 3:23 AM

screw those skinny bitches at the gym, and i know the feeling of pushing yourself!

p.s. seeming as you are working so hard, you are probly using muscles you havent used in a long time. thus building them. Well, muscle actually weighs alot more than fat, so while you are losing weight and gaining muscle, the numbers may not actually even fluctuate that much. I know its disheartening not to see the scale change.... but the proof is in the pants!

Secretia said...
January 19, 2010 at 8:01 AM

Keep the faith, you know it will work, you're smart enough.
All colors will look slimming on you soon :)

Secretia

kys said...
January 19, 2010 at 8:59 AM

Good for you! I suck at the elliptical. I haven't attempted to use one in 2 years.

I've been exercising 6 days a week since this dealio started but only at home. Friday I go back to the gym and climb on the dreaded elliptical. Dun-dun-duuuun.

PS I start Zumba again on Sunday. Or tonight if dumbass comes home early enough.

vinomom said...
January 19, 2010 at 10:52 AM

I exercised all last week but of course did nothing and ate like an asshole all weekend. I've got to find an alternative way to eat on the weekends!

I cannot believe you did an HOUR of Cardio. I cannot do anything close to that! If you are doing that much resistance and incline you very well could have gained muscle and thats why the scale isn't reflecting that. I wish I had your endurance.

Danielle said...
January 19, 2010 at 11:48 AM

I feel ya sister. I have been working my ass off too and gained 3 lbs. Now, I am PMS-ing, so next week this shit better show some results!