So How Was Your Decade?

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2010. A new decade. I usually don't pull my head out of my ass long enough to do any type of serious self-reflection but in honour of the fast approaching new year I thought I would make a list of accomplishments, failures and whatnot over the past 10 years.

So yeah, what have I done over the past decade? Let's see, the most life altering moment was when I left my first husband. That was fun. A game the whole family can play (literally). I don't recommend it unless of course you wake up one morning and rather than rolling over to issue a sleepy "good morning sweetheart" you roll over and contemplate sneaking out of bed, heading to the kitchen to grab the biggest knife you can find and doing bodily harm to your significant other. Yeah, then it might be time to reconsider your direction in life.

I learned what it felt like to almost lose a child. I can't say I really recommend this one either. Though the upside of this is that that child will be more precious to you than anything else in life, forever.

I decided three years ago my life wasn't chaotic enough and going to University to obtain my degree would be a great idea. It will probably take me 20 years at the rate I'm going to get said degree. I have visions of walking across the stage with the assistance of a walker, and having my Depends undergarments fail me miserably at the most inopportune time.

I bought my first house, all by myself. Signing the mortgage made me feel like I was finally a real grown up. Which is odd considering having children didn't give me this feeling.

I learned that friends will save your life. Their kindness will sometimes bring  you to your knees. Family is wonderful, but friends are there because they want to be, not because they have to be.

I lived by myself for the first time ever, and learned that I liked it....alot.

I traveled to Europe and found true love (or a serious case of true lust).  And learned that sometimes love is not enough.

Four days before boarding a plane to Paris (a LIFELONG dream of mine) I had to cancel the trip because  my daughter was in the neurology unit of a children's hospital. This taught me that my own hopes and dreams aren't nearly as important (insignificant really) as the hopes and dreams of my children and I would sacrifice ANYTHING in my own life, to make their dreams come true.

I've learned that underneath the mother, wife, housecleaner, chaffeur, worker...there lurks a woman. Although my life has been shaped by all of these roles, I'm something more than the culmination of these roles.

I am a leader. This was one of the most startling things I learned about myself. For someone who spent all of her teen years and a good deal of her early twenties following others, this was a bit of a revelation. Perhaps this revelation comes to everyone, with age and/or experience.

I'm not the same person I was when the world rang in the new millenium. I don't have the same ideals, goals or values. I would say I've completely reinvented myself but that would sound totally retarded.

At the end of the next decade I'll be closer to 50 than I will be to 40. I'll have kids in their 20's who may have kids of their own. This of course would make me one of the youngest, coolest grandmas in the world.

I'm looking forward to seeing who I will be.

I hope 2010 is full of happiness for all of you.


Laura said...
December 30, 2009 at 1:17 PM

We are more alike than you could realize. This was a wonderful read. I love that I'm not alone in that I discovered myself in the last 10 years and the first step was leaving my husband. I also too will have children in their 20's which BTW could make ME the youngest, coolest grandma in the world ;-) (though I'm hoping they wait til the later part of their 20's for that).

*raises glass* Here's to the next 10 years, as even stronger, better, women.

Anonymous said...
December 30, 2009 at 1:36 PM

What a great post. It makes me want to totally copy you and do a Ten Year post. I hope you thinking imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. :)

Seriously that was awesome. What happened to your daughter? Here is to 2010 - a new decade with more exciting things to come. :)

(ps you can "reply" to this)

Daffy said...
December 30, 2009 at 1:45 PM

I love reading all this and getting a glimpse into how you've become the phenomenal person we see via your blog.

I thought about doing a post like this but I'm not ready to be that deep yet. It's there...just don't think I want to put it out for blogland.

Its always amazing to read about the strength in others and I think a special blessing when one can see their own strengths and appreciate how they came to be.

Monique-aka-Surferwife23 said...
December 30, 2009 at 1:51 PM

Awesome post! And I feel you and I have a lot in common minus that whole closer to 50 thing at the end of the next decade. Eek! I had to actually sit back and think about that one. Scary.

Drama Queen said...
December 30, 2009 at 2:05 PM

Great post! Isn't it amazing what we learn about ourselves - especially when faced with adversity? I love being a strong woman...!

Peggy said...
December 30, 2009 at 2:40 PM

What an amazing reflection of the decade. Made me think about all the changes life threw my way...and how I'll be closer to 60 than 50 in 2020...

Mad Woman said...
December 30, 2009 at 3:18 PM

Did you find that reading back that list made you realise just how awesome you are? You've accomplished a lot!! I just about have my post about the last decade done, but not quite.

Danielle said...
December 30, 2009 at 4:18 PM

Cool decade reflection. If I could remember yesterday, I would do the same.
I do hope that our weight loss goals and happiness in 2010 are all achieved.

Mae Rae said...
December 30, 2009 at 5:29 PM

NO DOUBT you would be the coolest! Great reflections btw.

Alex said...
December 30, 2009 at 5:52 PM

Must be that time of year for reflections.

Your accomplishments are awesome! I wish I felt like a grown up LOL. Might take a few more years, I think (and I have 4 kids).

Carol said...
December 30, 2009 at 6:37 PM

What doesn't kill us only makes us stronger - no doubt about it.

Anonymous said...
December 30, 2009 at 8:35 PM

I've learned quite alot in the past decade... but then again I spent most of the past decade in my teens. With the start of this new decade, I will be starting my life as an young adult. Oy. I need a drink.

Aunt Juicebox said...
December 30, 2009 at 8:39 PM

I've had a mostly decent past ten years. I'm hoping the next ten are better.

adrienzgirl said...
December 30, 2009 at 10:06 PM

You are such an inspiring person! No doubt about that. Thanks for the reflection! :D I am ready for 2010!

gayle said...
December 31, 2009 at 1:38 AM

Wow you have done so much ...makes me want to sit and figure out what it is that I have done. Don't think nearly enough.

Sometimes love is not enough are so right and sometimes when you love someone you just can't be with them

Martinis or Diaper Genies? said...
December 31, 2009 at 11:50 AM

Wow. Makes my realization that I shouldn't wear a heel higher than 4 inches seem small.

Anonymous said...
December 31, 2009 at 11:23 PM

I got an award for ya over at the Accidental Advocate. :) HNY!

blueviolet said...
January 2, 2010 at 12:02 PM

Oh man, I feel the same way. I got married so young and had children at a young age so I never really figured out who the heck I am. Now I'm an empty nester with no clue!

I hope we both figure this thing out.

Happy New Year!

JennyMac said...
January 2, 2010 at 6:01 PM

Such an insightful and poignant post. Thank you for sharing this...

Hope 2010 holds something amazing in store.

Queen of Feisty said...
January 2, 2010 at 10:01 PM

I like the idea of a decade blog post. I'm gunna steal it. Thanks! Great post, it's amazing what I would have said 10 years ago about kids and sacrafice and if you ask me now that I have them. It's not even a question.


kys said...
January 4, 2010 at 11:56 AM

I hope 2010 is a fabulous kick-off for an awesome decade! I'm glad to have "met" you in '09.